like the Leaning Tower
July 27, 2008
July 23, 2008
July 19, 2008
there for you
sometimes im a selfish fake. you are always true, i dont deserve you. cause im not there for you, please forgive me again.
i want to be there for you. someone you can come to, runs deeper than my bones. i want to be there for you.
swirling shades of blue, slow dancing in your eyes. sun kisses the earth and i hush my urge to cry. i want to be there for you cause i hear the whispered words, in your masterpiece beautiful. you speak the unspeakable through, i love you too.
i wanna be there for you...
i want to be there for you. someone you can come to, runs deeper than my bones. i want to be there for you.
swirling shades of blue, slow dancing in your eyes. sun kisses the earth and i hush my urge to cry. i want to be there for you cause i hear the whispered words, in your masterpiece beautiful. you speak the unspeakable through, i love you too.
i wanna be there for you...
July 18, 2008
hidden
once again, i welcome my blog to be an avenue for 2 things
firstly, to express myself, no matter how coded or abstract i tend to be at times. there are some things that just not meant to be explicit.
secondly, to keep a record, regardless of how incongruous. its better than none.
while i should and will have a discussion soon, the feeling of kept in the dark and left clueless is boiling over. and for once, i really hope my hunch is wrong and especially since i have so much incomplete information and knowledge. only time will tell.
at the end of the day, what matters to me most is that beautiful smile on your face and that you are truly happy and will be happy. will you?
firstly, to express myself, no matter how coded or abstract i tend to be at times. there are some things that just not meant to be explicit.
secondly, to keep a record, regardless of how incongruous. its better than none.
while i should and will have a discussion soon, the feeling of kept in the dark and left clueless is boiling over. and for once, i really hope my hunch is wrong and especially since i have so much incomplete information and knowledge. only time will tell.
at the end of the day, what matters to me most is that beautiful smile on your face and that you are truly happy and will be happy. will you?
July 14, 2008
perturbed
a combination of factors has added up to be this very very rare mood of mine. but yeah, all has perturbed me significantly.
the "BRILLIANT AND DYNAMIC" class, that i study with, has once again found its way to prove itself. this time in politics and back-stabbing. seriously, in the position im in, im neither a threat nor responsibility to them, yet to my serious displeasure, i found a few knives impaled into my back.
its wtf. my policy was to egatively implicating others in my plan and i followed it to the line. and yet, some disillusioned fuckers has found the time and energy to try out her / theirs knife stabbing skills. it is at these times, where i appreciate the need of secercy of one's plan, as demonstrated by regularly by a fellow class mate.
the "BRILLIANT AND DYNAMIC" class, that i study with, has once again found its way to prove itself. this time in politics and back-stabbing. seriously, in the position im in, im neither a threat nor responsibility to them, yet to my serious displeasure, i found a few knives impaled into my back.
its wtf. my policy was to egatively implicating others in my plan and i followed it to the line. and yet, some disillusioned fuckers has found the time and energy to try out her / theirs knife stabbing skills. it is at these times, where i appreciate the need of secercy of one's plan, as demonstrated by regularly by a fellow class mate.
July 12, 2008
speechless
perhaps the sudden free amount of time have left me nothing to do at home. as such, it is indeed a good time to blog once again about the guy that got hated, backstabbed and misunderstood once again.
being a normal boy with a wacky brain, he unfortunately, has to be part of the frontline that safeguards the future which in turns protects the nation's economy. it was during one of these sacred duties that he realises internal threats from the back are always of significant damage to one than external ones that are always there.
constant vigilance? definitely, but one's eyes must be towards one's rear.
when a student meets another, common question includes:" when you graduate?(ie the date you get the hell out of the shit hole?)", " where you going after graduating?", not "how are you gonna backstab me today?" this is more pertinent if the MOE were from similar backgrounds. one would and could expect mutual tolerance and acceptance if there is any slight deviation from the standard operating procedures. but yet the world is always cruel and likes to prove such unfounded beliefs wrong. what one see is the actual "making small report" that happens so common in modern day office. lesson reinforced.
think about who you are to me, then decide what to do next.=)) understand?
being a normal boy with a wacky brain, he unfortunately, has to be part of the frontline that safeguards the future which in turns protects the nation's economy. it was during one of these sacred duties that he realises internal threats from the back are always of significant damage to one than external ones that are always there.
constant vigilance? definitely, but one's eyes must be towards one's rear.
when a student meets another, common question includes:" when you graduate?(ie the date you get the hell out of the shit hole?)", " where you going after graduating?", not "how are you gonna backstab me today?" this is more pertinent if the MOE were from similar backgrounds. one would and could expect mutual tolerance and acceptance if there is any slight deviation from the standard operating procedures. but yet the world is always cruel and likes to prove such unfounded beliefs wrong. what one see is the actual "making small report" that happens so common in modern day office. lesson reinforced.
think about who you are to me, then decide what to do next.=)) understand?
stumped
it is really a paradox.
when you dont want to blog, you have endless verbal diarrhea to pour out. yet, like this very moment when i feel like typing a few lines on to cyberspace, im stumped.
well, i was using that previous line to kick start my blogging engine.
been fighting the sleeping monster daily, and while so far, i have edge out. i fear that these are just Pyrrhic victories. it is in hope that my body gets accustomed to it and the rest will follow suit soon.
they say it takes 21 days to develop a habit, lets test it out.
when you dont want to blog, you have endless verbal diarrhea to pour out. yet, like this very moment when i feel like typing a few lines on to cyberspace, im stumped.
well, i was using that previous line to kick start my blogging engine.
been fighting the sleeping monster daily, and while so far, i have edge out. i fear that these are just Pyrrhic victories. it is in hope that my body gets accustomed to it and the rest will follow suit soon.
they say it takes 21 days to develop a habit, lets test it out.
July 9, 2008
im like hancock
back from the movie. not bad.
details below...
Soon into the superhero spectacular “Hancock,” before the machinery has fully kicked in, and the story is still wreathed in blissful ambiguity, you see the star Will Smith sprawled on a Los Angeles bench. Dirty, disheveled, in full distressed costume and character, and within easy sloshing reach of a bottle, he looks lost and alone, much like all the human detritus that washes up in every city and remains mostly unnoticed. But there’s no ignoring Hancock, who has amazing powers. He can fly, for starters, and soon enough he’s blasting straight into the heavens, the first homeless superhero in movies — Superbum! Alas (bummer), though he can look the part, Hancock isn’t literally homeless, just rootless, troubled and bedeviled. He drinks hard, swears at children (who curse him in turn), rarely shaves, never smiles. Worse, he has lousy superhero style, with sneakers and shorts (no cape), a grubby watch cap pulled over his forehead and buggy sunglasses that hide his (X-ray?) eyes. His takeoffs and landings are a mess: sloppy and violent, they invariably leave a heap of trouble and general rubble in his wake. He’s Pothole Man, Train Wreck Man, but mainly he’s Seriously Ticked Off Man, which, given that he’s also a black man in Los Angeles, suggests that this superhero story comes with some bite, even a few nibbling sharp teeth. Although whatever teeth it had have mostly been pulled, “Hancock” makes for one unexpectedly satisfying and kinky addition to Hollywood’s superhero chronicles.
i give 3.5 stars
July 6, 2008
tools
heard from somewhere today :" the fact that things turn out this way, does not necessarily means it going to be this way forever."
hmmm, that got me thinking and then realising that it does make sense.
relieved some of the despair
relieved some of the tension and the stuck-up thought of mine.
relieved some of the unnecessary pressure.
started to clean up some junk, plenty more to go.
bit by bit, shall clear them up. shall remember not to increase the mess as well. learning to turn perspective of frustration and detest into tools of usefulness.=)
hmmm, that got me thinking and then realising that it does make sense.
relieved some of the despair
relieved some of the tension and the stuck-up thought of mine.
relieved some of the unnecessary pressure.
started to clean up some junk, plenty more to go.
bit by bit, shall clear them up. shall remember not to increase the mess as well. learning to turn perspective of frustration and detest into tools of usefulness.=)
July 4, 2008
FEAR?
there is great fear. great fear coursing through me.
fear of being who i can really be
fear of achieving what i can
fear of overcoming that fear
fear is trying to wrest me back into its control.
so many psychosomatic processes and mental thoughts attempting to hold me, throwing up their biggest stunts ever to retain me in its original shape.
i see all of that, yet it has me paralyzed. as i, in an effort to triumph over it, type it out now. it is preventing me from writing the goals down, preventing me in a futile effort from achieving. it is so illogical and stupid to have that fear, yet it is gripping me right now.
i can see why is it so aptly named "the courage to create" now.
break through it, bit by bit
fear of being who i can really be
fear of achieving what i can
fear of overcoming that fear
fear is trying to wrest me back into its control.
so many psychosomatic processes and mental thoughts attempting to hold me, throwing up their biggest stunts ever to retain me in its original shape.
i see all of that, yet it has me paralyzed. as i, in an effort to triumph over it, type it out now. it is preventing me from writing the goals down, preventing me in a futile effort from achieving. it is so illogical and stupid to have that fear, yet it is gripping me right now.
i can see why is it so aptly named "the courage to create" now.
break through it, bit by bit
July 1, 2008
.jpg)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
